Love and Dating with Excessive Sweating
First dates are always stressful. It does not matter whether you are a man or a woman. You want, need, to feel as though you are putting your best self out there for the other person. You bring out your nice clothes, you nicest makeup, and your best shoes. For some people, the mere thought of doing this may seem daunting. They are the people who live with hyperhidrosis, the sweating disorder that makes getting ready, or dating, seem like a nightmare. We are here to assure you that love and dating are possible with hyperhidrosis, and when you overcome your anxiety; nothing but joy will follow.
The Fear of Excessive Sweating
Since hyperhidrosis is commonly associated with stressful situations, it may seem that dating would tip the scales so that you turn into only a puddle at their feet. If you even make it to the door to say, “Hi”. Stress increases the heart rate, tenses the muscles, and more. Adding in a first date or other more intimate situations only increases this effect, even for people who are not affected by heavy sweating of the underarms, feet, hands, or face.
Your fear may be that your date will be grossed out by the fact that when they hold your hand, you will make them lose interest. You may worry that when you have sweat dripping off your nose, that they are looking around in embarrassment or that when you walk your shoes are sloshing.
The truth is, you are only making it harder for yourself by stressing over what you think they may feel about your condition. To combat it, and feel more comfortable in your skin, don’t sweat it!
Embrace Your Body
Approximately 59% of people say that they feel limited by this condition in the most personal areas of their life (1). This does not have to be your story. Many people have found ways to work around their body’s natural “rivers” and have moved into the dating world (2). The results have been outstanding for them and they have found the love that they deserved.
Some people feel better about meeting their hyperhidrosis head-on when they are in the dating scene. Instead of avoiding hand-holding to avoid stress, they may simply state that they apologize for their sweaty hands, but “the excitement of getting ready for the date has caused their hyperhidrosis to kick into full force.” They allow their date to get an understanding of the condition and may even tell them what may be done to counter it. For instance, they may explain that when symptoms appear they may fiddle with or hold a napkin.
In general, you will discover that your date has less issue with the fact you are sweating than you may at first believe. Remember, everyone sweats and its nothing to be ashamed of. You may just simply need to work around it by sitting closer to an air conditioner’s vent during dinner. Chances are good, if you do not make a huge deal out of it, your date won’t either. Not if they are the “right” one for you.
The Right Partner
Love and dating with hyperhidrosis is possible. When you find the right one, they will be understanding of the fact that you are unable to control your body, that you are clean, and a good person who simply needs to be kept cool. They may even strive to help you to deal with it in surprising ways.
Some partners will cool off a vehicle before allowing you to get in. They may hold your plate when the two of you are dining in a buffet situation or do other things to help combat tense situations with you. Your partner may also plan date nights in a way that will help you also. Instead of proposing you two enjoy a Mexican feast or hooking up at a bar, they offer to take you to casual restaurants that do not have excess spices on their food and ice cream as the after-dinner treat.’
Enjoy the Intimate Times
As things progress toward more intimate moments between the two of you, you may yet stumble upon some of the common insecurities that excessive sweating will leave you with. By this point, your partner should already know that you have a condition, but this may not take away from the fear that you will get gross during those moments. Stop worrying! Approximately 34% of people have reported that hyperhidrosis negatively impacts their sex life (3). You are not alone in your concerns or in your struggles to deal with excessive sweating.
Luckily, there are things you and your partner can do. The first thing is to understand that everyone sweats during intimate moments. For some people, sweat means that it is more enjoyable and even people without the condition may sweat a lot. There has been some proof that people even end up sweating on their feet during intimate encounters.
- If it still bothers you to the point that you feel uncomfortable, you may consider:
- Adding Fans or a Portable Air Conditioner
- Taking Breaks to Build Excitement
- Keeping Towels Nearby for Sticky Situations* Use Extra Antiperspirant or Body Spray (Especially on the areas of your body that sweat the most.)
If you notice excessive sweat on your face during sex, or if your partner does not enjoy sweat dripping onto them, you may need to change your position. Spooning is always a great option. Intimacy in the shower can also be great for heavy sweaters.
Enjoy Life, Love and Dating with Hyperhidrosis
Hyperhidrosis is a condition that you have. It is not something that has you. You can enjoy life to the fullest once you figure out what your triggers are and how to overcome them. The same is true for love and dating with hyperhidrosis. With a love of self and a good partner, you can find all the joy that you are entitled to. Are you ready to embrace the satisfaction of a good partnership?